Lessons Learned, Part Two

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Everyday is a new beginning. Everyday we wake up, we have a chance to achieve something, learn something, try something new, go a different direction with our life, or continue on our intended path. Each new day is an opportunity to learn something. Each passing day is a chance for growth. We can either focus on improvement and the good in our life or we can waste each day given to us by focusing on the bad and completely ignoring life all together. I wish I would have started earlier in life regarding things I have learned throughout my life. I am not talking about things learned out of a textbook. I am talking about life lessons. I wish I would written these things down, read them over, and learned from them. However, it is never too late to start!

The following list is a continuation of life lessons learned:

1. You can’t change anyone but yourself

2. Everyone tells lies at some point in their life. Second chances are often worth it. Learn to trust again.

3. Giving is better than receiving.

4. Life is short. Tell people you love them, spend time with people who matter to you, and do what you  love.

5. You will never learn it all, but never stop trying!

6. It is taking me longer than I expected to be the person I want to be.

7. We can keep on living even after we think we can’t.

8. Life can change in a matter of minutes, good or bad.

9. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. You always have a choice.

10. Change is the only constant thing.

Think about your own life and examine your own life lesson’s. You will be amazed on how much you write down and learn from what you write down. Add some humor to your list and don’t always focus on the serious side of life. Remember to  keep your list going. This would be a good “hand me down” for future generations and others to learn from. What are your own lesson’s learned?

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Things I Would Tell My Younger Self

I have spent most of my life worrying and over thinking so many different things that have gone on in my life. I am 35 years old, will be 36 in a few months, and something occurred to me a couple nights ago when I could not sleep. I started to think of things that I would tell my younger self in hopes of my older self to live a better life. It is never too late to better your life. Some people use age as an excuse to not do things. It is never too late to try something different, to think differently, and to improve your life. If you start doing something positive today, it will better your life right away. So here is a list of some things I would tell my younger self in hopes that my younger self would listen so the rest of her life will be better.

1. Stop worrying so much! Worrying is pointless and it drains your energy.

2. Who cares what other people think of you. It only matters what you think of you.

3. Enjoy the moment. Don’t concentrate so much on the past or the future. What will be, will be.

4. A positive attitude can go a long way. Whether you think you can or can not, you are right.

5. Don’t judge others. You don’t know what other people are going through.

6. Pick out the positive in each situation. Don’t dwell on the negative.

7. Learn to let things go. Life doesn’t always go as planned, so let the “not so pleasant things in life” go.

8. Money is important, but not that important.

9. Having a few close friends is better than having no friends at all.

10. Don’t take things for granted.

11. You don’t have to forget, but learn to forgive.

12. Try something new. Get out of your comfort zone and do new things.

13. Exercise and eating right is important, but when you want pizza or a burger, eat it!

14. Accept yourself as you are. God made you for a reason, so don’t change who you are.

15. Family is most important.

Those are just a few things that I have learned over my 35 years of life on this planet. I am sure I could come up with many more, but those are the most important, in no particular order. One never stops learning. Your life keeps evolving. Most people don’t like change, but learn from the changes to improve your life. Life is hard sometimes, but life is worth it.

Moving On After the Hurt & Pain

If I take a poll of how many of you have been hurt before whether it is physically, emotionally, or mentally, I bet everyone’s hand would go up. How sad of world we live in that everyone has experienced pain in some way. In a lot of people’s lives, we experience hurt over and over. We have all been involved on both sides of the coin. We have all hurt someone before and we have all been hurt by someone or something. It doesn’t matter what side of that coin we are involved in, we always feel like crap. In either case, we are unsure what to do next or what to say next. If we hurt someone, we want to make it right and apologize, or we should feel that way! If someone has hurt us, it is difficult to listen, to give them the benefit of the doubt, to forgive them and to move on. One of the hardest things in life is moving on after a hurt or after some sort of pain has been done to you. However, moving on is what you must do not only for your sake, but for the someone or something that hurt you.

Life can be good; is good at times. Life can be fun; is fun at times. Life is full of joyous events and memories. Look back on your life and think back to all the joyous memories. Sure there are a lot of them. Do you remember what you learned from those joyous events? I bet you can pick out a couple things you learned from those happy events. Now look back on the not so good moments. Look back on the moments where you have had to go through pain, hurt, anger, grief, & distrust. From the moment we are kids, we experience hurtful situations. It is all part of life and growing up. We don’t get our way, so we cry and make a fuss. As we grow older, the hurtful situations become more painful, but we learn more from them. Once again, do you remember what you learned from those not so joyous events? I bet you learn more from the sad times than you do the happy times. We grow more as a person going through pain than we do going through happy times.

Moving on after the pain is hard. You may not want to at first. That is understandable and normal. You want to stay locked in your anger and grief forever. You may not be able to handle moving on at first and that is normal too. However, the most important thing you can do for yourself and for the person or situation that hurt you, is to move on. Don’t let that person or situation drag you down. Don’t give them that satisfaction. Show them that you are the better person. Show them you can overcome their hurt and their stupid actions. Don’t hang on to the pain. Grow from it, learn from it, and make your life better because of it. Take something away from the situation and do something positive out of it. Help someone else in that same situation. Volunteer your time. Write for your self only or write something for others to see. Change careers. Exercise more. Make yourself healthier. Do whatever you can think of to improve your life from that situation and move on. Last, but not least, forgive the person or people that hurt you. It will take a long time. It will be a long road back to “normalcy”, but the journey will be worth it. Forgiving someone else shows them are you the better person.

Going through hurt and pain, makes the happier occasions special. Going through grief makes you appreciate the happier moments more. Life is hard. Life really sucks at times, but the journey is worth it. We learn from the situations, good and bad, that we are in. Those situations make us a better person. Life is not all about hurt and grief. There are many happy moments to take pride in. Move on from the hurt and pain. Don’t let the hurtful memories overcome you so much where you forget all the good times.

Life Goes On

If its one lesson I have learned over and over, it is this one: Life goes on. No matter what happens to you or someone else, the world keeps moving. I learned this lesson early on and for some reason life keeps throwing it at me. We all have our issues and our problems to work through. No one goes through life unscathed. Some seem to have an easier life than others. They may have a few issues to deal with, but they seem to have less hurdles to jump over. Than their are others who at every turn have an obstacle to work around. Why is that? Why are some lives easier than others? Why do some people have lessons thrown at them and problems to deal with one right after another while others seem to breeze right through life? I wish I had that answer.

I think some people are stronger than others. I think some can handle having problems thrown at them at a faster speed than others. God made all of us different and he made some of us with stronger souls than others. There is a reason we go through what we go through. There is a bigger plan for us. There is a reason for it all. Although we don’t fully understand why some have an easier life than others and why we go through the things we do, I do believe whatever is thrown at me, I can get through and overcome. I have that confidence in myself.

We are all at a different point in our life’s journey. Even though we have company along the way, we have to walk the road alone. No one can walk our journey for us. We have to complete it ourselves.

So how do you keep going after once again being thrown in a hole and forced to get yourself out of it? Just like you did the first time. You move on one day at a time. You let yourself go through the emotions of hurt, anger, pain, grief, and once that is done, you pick yourself back up, and climb a little at a time until your feet are on solid ground again. It is possible to do over and over. I am living proof of that. It may take a while, but it can be done.

  I read something online that fits just about every obstacle life can deal to you. I don’t know who said it or who wrote it, but it sure does fit. “Allow yourself to hope to believe and to trust again. Don’t let a few bad memories stop you from having a good life now.” Remember not to wallow in pity for too long or you will be stuck. You won’t be able to move on. There is a point in all situations where it is time to find a way out of that hole you were thrown in and get yourself out of it. At some point, you need to continue with life and move on. Remember,  life does not stop for anyone or anything. Life goes on!

Lesson’s Learned, Part One

So many of us go through life, or part of our lives, not paying attention. Sometimes, myself included. We are in such a hurry to go about our day and finish our day just to get up and do it all over again. We drive too fast, we hurry conversations, we hurry in and out of the stores, we rush our errands, and we wish the work day or school day away. Why? What is the point? When we hurry we are more likely to be involved in an accident, to miss a key point in a conversation, miss someone’s call for help, forget about something or someone, and miss the important things in life. Slow down, pay attention to the road, and enjoy the scenery while driving.  Enjoy your time with family & friends and don’t rush your time with them. When you are rushing your errands remember the home-bound people who can not get out of the house. This brings me to a lesson learned: slow down your life! You or your loved one’s life will be gone before you know it.

We live in a world of want this and want that. It is always a want before a need. I am guilty of this most of the time. However, I am changing my thinking and habits on this. We keep up with the latest technology, we want the newest vehicles, kids want the latest toys, book lovers want that new book as soon as it comes out, movie lovers must see that movie as soon as it is released, and the same with music. Up until recently I always thought I needed my wants in order to be happy and live life to the fullest. I forgot about my needs. What are your most important needs? Mine? To feel loved, to spend time with family & friends, to have a roof over my head, to have enough money to buy groceries and pay bills. Notice I did not say my most important need is the latest laptop, tablet, cell phone, book, or DVD. Not too long ago I would become jealous of anyone with the latest technology, with a bigger house, with a newer car, or with a better job. Another lesson learned: Enjoy what you have because most people don’t have what you have. If other people have what you want, be happy for them because more than likely they worked for it and earned it. If your needs are met and you have a want in mind, well then, work for it. Don’t expect it to be handed to you.

Every time I turn the news on I hear of shootings, people being killed, and the talk of war. I also hear about too many friends fighting, too many families in conflict with each other, and people talking about other people behind their back. Everyone knows of a friend or family member who is not getting along with someone. In fact, many of those situations have been going on for so long that they either forgot why they are fighting or they don’t care anymore about what caused it. People, please let it go! Life is so short. Don’t engage in gossip. You have no idea what it is like to be in another person’s shoes. Even if you think you do or you have been involved in a similar situation, everyone handles things differently. Lesson learned: Don’t judge other people. Try helping them instead!

Over the years my eyes have been opened to more important things in life. I am learning to let the past go. I am learning to not care what other people think of me. I am learning to let life play out. I understand if I really want something bad enough, I need to work for it. I am putting my time and effort into more important things such as spending more time with family & friends, volunteering, spoiling my niece & nephew’s, spoiling my cats, and yes, even putting myself first before anything else! It may be time to rethink you life and the way you live it. Don’t let it be too late before your eyes are opened to the more important things in life.

In A Perfect World

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In a perfect world…..

  • There would be no war. There would be peace only. We’d all get along.
  • Every dog and cat would have a home.
  • We’d all be happy with our looks.
  • We would not discriminate towards others.
  • There would be no judging of other people.
  • There would be freedom for all.
  • There would be no reason to worry. Everything would always work out just fine.
  • Sickness would not exist.
  • Everyone would be happy. There would be no mental health disabilities.
  • Physical handicaps would not exist.
  • Know one would understand what the word “abuse” meant because it does not exist.
  • Plants and flowers would not die.
  • There would be no pain.
  • We would not label other people.
  • Hate would not exist.
  • Crying would be only for happy moments.
  • We would accept one another as they are.
  • There would be no poverty.
  • No one would go hungry.
  • Everyone would throw their trash away instead of on the ground.
  • There would be more forgiveness.
  • There would be more sharing.
  • Everyone that wanted a job would have one.
  • People would respect mother nature.
  • World disasters would not happen.
  • Everyone would believe in miracles.
  • There would be no shootings in schools, in the workplace, in neighborhoods, etc…

Can you imagine living in a world where all of this were true? Wouldn’t that be amazing? Can you think of other things to add to the list? Isn’t it sad that it does not exist here on Earth? It is sad to say that I don’t think these things will ever happen here on Earth. There will always be sickness. There will always be disasters. Some people will always judge and discriminate. I wish everyone would start doing one good thing for someone a day. It doesn’t have to be anything big. It is the little things that matter most. Hold a door open for someone. Call an old friend. Help a neighbor. Or do one positive thing to make this a better world to live in. Donate your time or money to an organization. Clean up mother nature by picking trash up. Spend more time with family and friends. We are all here for just a short time. I think the majority of people have learned that lesson. Lets make this world a better place to live in.