Does It Really Matter?

Life. There is so much to do and so much to say. So much to concentrate on and so much to forget. Some things to worry about and most things to let go.  Certain things to accomplish and some to throw out the window.

Does it really matter if we drive 85mph in a 70mph zone just to get somewhere two minutes faster? Does it really matter if I write this blog all in first person or part in first person, second person, and third person? Does it really matter if I follow a diet so to speak or eat and drink what I want in moderation? Does it really matter if I am 110 pounds or 160 pounds? Does it really matter what others think or what I think? Does it really matter if I stay up till 10pm or 2am? Does it really matter if I am not working, working part time or working full time? Does it really matter that I have two college degree’s and not using either of them? Am I doing what I love? Am I doing what I want to do? Am I doing what makes me happy? Well, there you go!

Figure out what is important to you, follow it, and do it.  Something I have learned over and over again is we are here one day and gone the next. It first started with my son being in my belly one day & gone seconds later. Then my oldest brother was here one day & gone minutes later. My daughter was here one day and gone hours later. My second oldest brother was here one day and gone the next. So on and so on and so on……

The older I get, the less I worry. The older I get, the more I realize what is important and what is not important. As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else, the older I get, the more I do what makes me happy.

Don’t let life get in the way of what you want to do.

 

 

 

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Life Is About Balance

 

When one walks on a tight rope, balance is the key. When someone stands on one foot, balance is the key. Life is all about balance. Too much of anything is not good for you. Too much of anything will over whelm a person. Too many sweets gets a person sick. Too much work makes a person dull and stressed. Too much play can have a negative effect on a person. Even too much water is not good for you! Your life and even your day is about balance.

Creating balance in one’s life can be difficult. It’s easy to get wrapped up in life and forget why we are all here in the first place. It’s easy to get so down on life where all you think about is yourself. It’s also easy to be so high on life where all you think about is yourself. It all comes down to balance.

Think of the man or woman who works 60 plus hours a week. They may or may not enjoy the work, but either way it’s stressful. There is no balance.

What about the man or woman who stays home with the kids. There is no break. It’s all about the kids, tending to their needs, driving them here and there. Yes the parent loves their kids and wouldn’t trade it for anything, but where is the balance? How do they relax? It’s all about balance.

Think of the anorexic who does not eat, but exercises too much. Or the opposite habits in some people. There is no balance to this kind of life either.

Think of the depressed person who can’t leave the house on some days or get anything done on some days. There is a soul in that person waiting to be set free and soar. Too much depression in one’s life, and quite frankly, the opposite of that, is not good. It all comes down to balance.

There is time to hold on and a time to let go. There is a time for work and a time for play. There is a time for family & friends and a time for yourself. There is a time to splurge and a time to hold back. There will be down times in a person’s life and high moments in a person’s life. It is so simply really, but difficult at the same time to keep balance in one’s life. The key to life, if you can find it, is balance.

My Life’s Path

Yesterday I was sitting at my breakfast nook table looking out my window at the cold and snow. I was drinking a cup of hot, herbal tea and pondering my life. I have always been so concerned with not working in the traditional sense and bringing in an income. I feel I am not contributing to society. Regardless of the volunteer I work do with my local Humane Society and with my local Lions Club, I still feel it is not enough. I have many interests. However, not enough ambition. I want to contribute to society more and help more people. At the same time, I have no interest in working on another person’s time. I have this strong desire to work my own schedule. I will always be working for someone else. Working for someone else is not the issue. Whether my writing takes off or not, I will be working for someone else. As selfish as this sounds, I want to contribute to society more and help more people, but on my own time and my own work schedule.  I don’t care what everyone else does. I am concerned with me and my career life.

As I sat there looking out the window, a thought came to me that I am on the right path for my own life. I need to stop worrying about not working in the traditional sense, stop worrying what others think of me and go for what I want. I am on the right path for me. I am on the right path for my life. I believe all of my life experiences have shaped me to who I am today. They have shaped my interests and change my life course. In 35 years I have been through a lot. I have been through more than what most people think. I believe I am putting too much pressure on certain area’s of my life and not enough pressure on other parts. I am putting too much pressure on being someone I do not want to be and not enough pressure on being the person who I want to be. I need to let go of the stereotypes I put on myself and the stereotypes society puts on me. My life will work out if I I let certain things go and accept I am who I am.

I do not think I am alone when it comes to battling with what we want to do with our lives versus what society thinks we should do with our lives. I am here to tell you that we all need to let go of that. We need to go after what we want, not what society, our friends, family, or neighbors think we should be doing. I believe I am on the right path. I need to stop searching for my life’s purpose because I found it. I just need more ambition, more drive, and more confidence to go after it. What would this world be like if we all went after what we want instead of doing what society thinks we should be doing? Find your purpose. Find your ambition. What is that you want out of life? Stop worrying about all the “what if’s?” and let go of all that. It is time for not only me, but all of us to get out of our comfort zone and go after what we want!

Goals

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Goals

I came across this today while I was searching for inspiration regarding blog topics. I had multiple topics picked out, multiple quotes ready to blog about, but I wasn’t able to type anything. I had a blank look on my face and eventually logged out only to log back in.

Goals. I have never been one to set them, but maybe I should. I would probably achieve more and be more productive. I always have good intentions to start out with regarding a new goal and then I eventually stall out. Either it is not that important to me after all, I give up out of frustration, or I procrastinate and forget what I was working towards. The goals that stick with me, however, are the ones that matter. They are the ones that are in my head and in my heart. I don’t need to write them down to remember them and work towards them. My feet follow because my heart and head are in the lead. A near year and for me, a fresh start. Here’s to working harder towards what you want out of life. Life is way too short, so don’t take it for granted.

Breaking Out Of A Rut

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Why is it that doing something good for yourself, doing something that benefits your health and well being can be difficult? Eating right, exercising, thinking positively, and surrounding yourself with positive people are all ways to improve yourself and can make you happier. In addition, volunteering in the community and having a satisfying job will also make your happier. So why is it that many of us don’t do it? It just goes to show you how easy it is for all of us to be stuck in a rut and fall into a period of depression. There are many people out there in this world that think people with a mental illness can magically become better on their own and that getting rid of their mental illness will happen quickly. How the rest of us wish that were true! Recovery is a long process. It does not happen overnight.

This blog is not just to help me, but to help others. If one person reads this and finds some hope, motivation, and inspiration, I will be happy. It no longer matters to me that my family and friends know what I have been dealing with for so long. If one person gains something positive out of this, it is all good.

One thing I have started doing that I didn’t believe in before is thinking positively. It is said that thinking positive can help you in any situation. I have heard from numerous people, “if you think you can or can’t, you are right.” People who deal with physical illnesses, such as cancer, can live longer just by thinking positively. I have started doing this. Instead of negative thoughts going through my mind, I have begun to think that everything will be okay. I will accomplish what I was put on this Earth to do. Things will improve. Draining out the negative thoughts will not happen overnight, but over time, there will be less negative thinking.

Something else I started doing is volunteering. I have to admit, I can’t always push myself out the door to do it, but I am getting better. I love animals, so I am volunteering at the local animal shelter. Those animals will put a smile on my face any day! Also, I joined our local Lions Club. There are many ways to become involved in your community through a club or an organization. Meeting new people and helping others is the key to feeling better about yourself.

As difficult as it can be for anyone, let alone for someone who has a mental illness, exercise is another key component. I have been lacking in that area for some time now, but I promised myself after Thanksgiving, it is time to get back to exercising. Moving your body in any way for any amount of time will benefit you and your attitude. It is hard to get back into exercise, but what I find for myself is once I do it once, the second time is easier!

Something I thought of last night to improve myself is the Nike Slogan, “Just Do It.” Pushing myself to do certain things takes days, if not weeks. Over time, the thought will become an action and I will “Just Do It.”

There are many ways to help yourself out of a rut or a period of depression. Some people live with it the rest of their lives. Some people have to cope with their mental illness instead of overcoming it. Medication and/or counseling does not help everyone. Some go through this year after year with no end in sight. I am thankful that I feel like I can overcome this. Being the stubborn person that I am, I am determined to overcome it on my own.  I have become my own patient and counselor at the same time! Over time, even if you are not able to overcome your depression, your rut, or work through your mental illness, there are ways to cope with it. It is not easy, I know. I have dealt with this most of my life. It is possible to have a life and cope with your mental illness. It is possible that some people may have to deal with it the rest of their lives. Some people will overcome it. Whatever the case, there is help. There are options. There are ways to make your life better, happier, and more enjoyable!

Find Joy in the Little Things

Life passes us by so quickly. Whether you are lucky enough to live to 75, 80, 85 or older or your life is cut short sooner, life goes by fast. One minute you are born naked and crying, and the next you are graduating from college and the next you have been married for 25 years and your kids are grown and moving on. We all get caught up in our day to day lives and we are often reminded that life does not always go our way. Your job may not be going well or something goes wrong at work. Your kids are struggling in school, things are stressful at home, your car breaks down at the same time as your furnace, and someone you know becomes ill. At times it can be difficult to find joy in the little things, but it is not impossible.

When life stresses you out, relax in the sunshine.

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Make sure to stop and enjoy the scenery.

ImageEnjoy one of life’s greatest games.

baseballgame

Enjoy time at the beach.

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Enjoy your favorite drink….or in this case, the actual coffee pot!

SandycoffeepotSurround yourself with pretty flowers.

MackinawTFalls 046There are things we all can do to enjoy life’s simplest pleasures. Wherever you are at, look around you and find joy in where you are. Give thanks for the good things in your life and be grateful for them. Give thanks for the trying times in your life and learn from them. We all are run down by life from time to time, but if we remember to “stop and smell the roses”,  life will be easier.

I Am Not the Norm

I am not sure why today of all days, but a thought was pushed into my head like a slap on my face. I have heard it before, thought of it before, and I might have even typed it before, but I don’t think I grasped the real meaning behind the thought. The thought came to me this morning while brushing my teeth and looking out my front window. Brushing my teeth is quite the activity for me. It is not just a quick brushing, spit, and be done. I can thank my mom for this. I brush my teeth twice a day and each time, I do some sort of combination of walking around my house, pacing, and sitting down to looking out my front window. Whatever the combination is, brushing my teeth makes me think about things. So, back to my “slap across the face thought.” It really hit me at that moment. I finally realized it. I am who I am.

Thinking back to my first day of kindergarten, I remember being scared and crying. I didn’t want to go and once there, I didn’t want my dad to leave. Back then, it was only a half day and even that half day was too much for me. Once sitting down at the tables, I looked around at all the kids who were strangers to me. I was terrified. As the school days went on, they did become easier. I made some friends and started to like school. Even from that first day of school, all you want is to fit in. You want to make friends and you want kids to like you. I was always trying to fit in and be like someone else. It didn’t matter what I did, I didn’t fit in. I wasn’t the skinny, popular runner in school like my brothers were. I am who I am! As the school years went on, I made friends, but I still always wanted to fit in with everyone else.

College came and left. Jobs came and left. Friends came and left. Life continued. No matter what I was trying to do, I was always trying to be like everyone else. I wanted to fit in with “the norm.” I wanted to be like everyone else. Well, that didn’t go so well! Nothing seemed to work.  My life was not going well. I struggled through depression and personal crisis after personal crisis. I was always worried about what someone else might think. I wasn’t even sure what I wanted out of life and even if I did know, I was scared to go after it. After struggling through personal crisis after personal crisis, my motivation and ambition was gone. Just when I was starting to gain some of that back, another crisis slapped me across the face and threw me to the ground. Just when I thought life couldn’t get any worse, it did. I felt like I was back to square one. All the progress I was making in moving forward with my life, just set me all the way back. Life does go on though. The world does not stop. The days went on and the weeks went on. Things are a little better now. I learned many, many things from this. I even relearned something: I am who I am!

It has taken me 35 years to realize I am who I am. I am done trying to fit in with “the norm.” I am not the norm! I am different than everyone else and I have different wants and needs. My parents had three boys before I came along. I have three older brothers and I am the youngest and only girl. That should have been my first clue that I am different. I don’t want the traditional 9:00 to 5:00 job, five days a week. That is not me. I am not doing that just to fit in with “the norm.” I want to write. I want to be published. I will write and I will be published. I don’t entertain a lot on the weekends. That is not me. I love lazy weekends where I don’t always have to talk to someone. I am not changing that just to fit in with “the norm.” I don’t like to talk a lot on the phone and I don’t always like to text. That is not me. I am not changing that just to fit in with “the norm.” I don’t always like to talk and be friendly when I am out shopping and running errands. Sometimes I just want to get done what I have to do and get back home. That is who I am. I love actual books over e-books. I’d rather hold a book in my hand than read an e-book. That is me! That is okay! So you see, I am who I am. That is perfectly fine with me and it doesn’t have to be fine with anyone else. I am who I am!